Mother’s Day… A Year after a Quarantine
Written by Dr. Ali Schweitzer
As I sit here, glass of wine on the table, kids in bed and my husband folding laundry, I can’t stop thinking about what a year it’s been. I mean, last year at this time I was climbing into bed after a Mother’s Day intentionally spent without my kids. I was amazed at the response I got to the blog I wrote (about needing space for myself), and my Mother’s Day hike with friends was just the beginning. I started taking care of myself again. I slowly started adding my self-care routine back into my schedule. Chronicling and sharing my need to take care of myself felt good and held me accountable. Yes, we were in crisis mode, but I could still take 30 minutes for myself, and when I expressed that to my kids and husband they agreed.
Mother’s Day 2021 looked a whole lot different. I remember agreeing with my friends last year that we were going to take Mother’s Day back and make it truly about ourselves by again spending the day without our kids. That sounded great at the time and I held on to that idea for a while, but as May 9th approached, I found myself wanting to spend time with my kids on my day. I had done so much over the past year to create a balance between being a business owner, mom, wife and myself that I looked forward to being celebrated by those who made me a mom. So, when one of my friends asked about our Mother’s Day plan for this year, I felt a bit torn. Torn because I loved spending Mother’s Day away from my kids last year, but also because I was in a much better headspace now and I wasn’t sure I wanted to be away all day. So, we came up with a compromise that couldn’t have worked out any better.
Saturday, I sent my son and husband off on a boys’ night, which included a night’s stay at a local hotel, and my daughter went to a friend’s house while I had a ladies’ wine night at my house. No kids – just a great group of women sitting around, drinking delicious wine and enjoying each other’s company. The night was amazing, and when it was time for my daughter to come home, I was ready to crawl into bed and snuggle her and spend the next day with my kids.
Now don’t get me wrong, I had some Mother’s Day rules this year, because – after spending last year alone – I knew how nice it was to just relax. This Mother’s Day involved me staying in my pajamas all day and not being responsible for any meals or kid drama. I spent the day snuggling with my kids on the couch, taking a nice bike ride to our neighborhood park (yes, in my pj’s…no shame here) and enjoying dinner cooked by my husband. All fights (because even on Mother’s Day there are bound to be arguments) were refereed by my husband and I didn’t even have to get up once to let the dogs out. After writing this, I plan on finishing my day by heading to bed early for a good night’s sleep.
It was nice to spend Mother’s Day with my kids this year and to reflect on the year we all had. And while I wore many hats over the past year that I don’t care to ever wear again, I am grateful that I was able to find myself, again, even in a quarantine. This past year made me realize how important self-care is for all of us, (our kids and partners included) and I plan on leading by example going forward, so that others start to realize that if mama ain’t happy, then ain’t nobody happy.
Dr. Ali is the owner and chiropractor at Active Family Chiropractic & Wellness.You’ll often see her and her family out on the trails, well-adjusted and having fun!