December 30, 2012
Posted By: Shaunescy
I have a secret. I lied to my kids the other day.
It seems like the whole valley has come down with the creeping crud. Cough, sniffles, sore throat. My kids brought it home for break and I got it too. I didn't feel bad but I got really croaky. My voice needed a rest. The day of hollering back and forth with my kids was not going to happen.
And my plan was hatched. For 24 hours, I was not going to speak above a whisper. How was I going to effectively parent without a holler or two? No shouting a warning of, "Kiiiiiiiiids! Knock it off!" No, barking, "Stop climbing on the back of the couch!"
I brought the kids close and whispered to them, "I've lost my voice. I can't talk. So today, you have to come to me to talk to me. If you have a question or need me, you have to be right by me so you can hear what I say. Please help me with this ok?"
They smiled and said my son and daughter respectively said, "Yes, mommy," and "Yes, mother." I don't know why my three year old refers to me in such a formal way, but she persistently does. They both gave me hugs and said they were sorry that I caught the cold.
We began the business of the day. Breakfast, and the like went pretty well. But you know as well as I do that the day has barely begun to reach it's normal decibel level before 9 AM. And I was in. I am as determined as a pit bull once I decide something. And although this was a challenge, I made it through.
I made it through the "Mom! she broke my Lego truck!" incident. Through the many hollers of, I want-I wants:
- Mom, I want a sandwich!
- Mother, I need a bowl of cereal!
- Mom, I want a apple!
- Mother, I need a drink of juice! Of water! Of milk!
- Mom, Do we have any candy!
The requests that get fired off right as you are elbow deep in laundry or the million other things you need to do in a day to make your house run, that you'd normally call back with a "Just a moment." Or ,"I'll be there in a minute."
Instead, I'd raise a finger and smile. And I'd whisper that I'd be there soon.
It was a really great day. I do not think that I am constitutionally able to carry it off every single day but I did learn a lot.
My kids will see me and respond to me if I am consistent. They accepted that the call and response wasn't going to work that day and adapted, very well.
I felt calmer and nicer and genuinely more tender-hearted and connected to their needs and concerns. I think that the simple intimacy of being in quiet close communication was a powerful force.
All my best ~ Bunnyfufu